Real Birth Stories: Vanessa on Pregnancy, Birth & Motherhood

Meet Vanessa

Every birth story is unique, and today, I’m honored to share Vanessa’s journey. She’s a stay-at-home mama of three, a homeschooler, and a birth doula! We share so many similar views on parenting, health, and birth, and I’m excited for you all to hear about her most recent experience—welcoming her baby at home.

Pregnancy: The Journey to Motherhood

Pregnancy is such a transformative experience, and no two pregnancies are exactly the same. Vanessa, as a mom of three, has gone through this journey multiple times, each with its own unique story.

As a mama of three, did each pregnancy feel different when you first found out?

Yes and no. Obviously, my first brought me into a whole new world, but I always knew I wanted to be a mother. So overall, gratitude was running through me—more so each time I was blessed with another opportunity to carry and grow life.

By the time you were expecting your third, you were already an experienced mom. How did this pregnancy compare to your first two?

With my third, I was a lot less anxious than with my first two. I was so confident in my body’s ability, and the care I was receiving only reinforced that confidence. I trusted my body to do everything it needed to grow a baby.

What was it like receiving prenatal care from a midwife?

It was absolutely amazing. I had two midwives, and they were just the most incredible women—so calm and confident in what they do, and in women doing what they need to do. They were also so comforting when I needed reassurance and guidance. My husband even built a great relationship with them, which he hadn’t done previously with my OB. It was amazing to have a full team on the same page, all focused on caring for Mom and Baby in whatever way was needed.

My husband getting involved might not seem like a big deal to some, since he wasn’t the one growing the baby, but to me, it was important that he learned as much as possible so he felt connected to the process. Our kids also attended almost every appointment, which made them so interested and engaged. They got to be as hands-on as possible. Overall, it was the best experience for myself and our family.

How did you prepare for your home birth? Were there any specific things you did differently this time around?

I had a lot of questions because going from two hospital births—where you just show up, have a baby, and leave—to prepping your own space for birth and recovery was a big shift. But the mental preparation for an unmedicated birth was similar. I had a plan in case things progressed quickly (which has happened to me before) and prepared my kids by reading books and talking them through what our day might look like. We decided to have them at home with us during labor and delivery.

We also chose where in the house we’d set up, did a test run with the tub to check for leaks, and timed how long it would take to set up. One big difference this time was actually laboring in the tub—it was a game changer. So calming and relaxing. I was initially nervous to get in too early because I didn’t want to slow things down, but it ended up being perfect.

I also used a comb during contractions, which was another “Why didn’t I do this before?” moment. And I didn’t do any cervical checks this time around, which was amazing because if you know, you know—having to sit semi-still for a cervical exam while trying to ride the waves of contractions is not fun.

Birth: The Big Day

Was this your first home birth? If so, what made you decide to have one?

Yes, this was my first home birth. Nothing traumatic led me to choose home birth over the hospital—I just wanted the freedom to choose what was best for me and my baby while still receiving guidance from educated women who do this work because they truly care, not just for a paycheck.

Can you walk us through your birth story?

I had been having prodromal labor for about a month already, so when I woke up that morning, I figured I’d probably end up back in bed soon—but that didn’t happen. I woke up cramping and tossed and turned for a while until I got up to use the restroom. That’s when I saw my mucus plug. I didn’t get too excited but mentally noted it and told my husband. I hopped in the shower to see if that would help me either get back to bed or confirm that it was time. In the shower, I started timing contractions, and they were getting closer and stronger.

I had my husband text my midwife to give her a heads-up, and I planned to check in an hour later. When we called her back, she was ready to head over. My husband started blowing up the tub, and by then, the kids had woken up. We told them it was baby time, called my mom to help, and then we snapped into "Whoa, it’s time! Are we ready?" mode. I even took a few last-minute bump pictures to remember the moment.

When my midwives arrived, they got settled, checked in on me, and mostly observed. I tend to want to labor on my own until I’m almost ready to push, which my husband already knew. My kids were in and out, my mom rubbed my back, and my midwives and I laughed about how the baby had decided not to come on Christmas Day.

Then, my son started rubbing my back with a glove my midwives had given him, and soon after, I told them I was ready to push. I remember almost asking for permission, and my midwife simply said, “Whenever you need to, just start, and we’ll be here.” That was a whoa moment for me because, in a hospital, when you say you need to push, it’s a whole different response. It was so empowering to trust my body fully.

My husband got into the tub to catch her, and a few minutes later—without even realizing it was my final push—she was born, gently into his arms. He scooped her onto my chest, and I kissed and welcomed her. We hadn’t found out the gender beforehand, so in that moment, we discovered we had another girl! One sibling had been rooting for a sister, the other for a brother, so there were definitely some feelings, but all in all, we had a beautiful, healthy baby to love.

The kids got to watch their sister be born, and they still talk about it in amazement and curiosity. It makes me feel like we did the right thing by letting them be present.

Postpartum & Motherhood: The Fourth Trimester

How were those first few weeks postpartum?

They were pretty great. It was such a gentle transition. Once I birthed her, I moved straight to bed and birthed my placenta there. After that, I didn’t get up unless I had to use the restroom, which was pure bliss. What stood out most was how taken care of I felt by my midwives. They accommodated us instead of us having to go out of our way for care.

For moms considering a home birth, what’s one piece of advice you’d share?

Do it. If you’re even considering it, reach out to moms, research midwives, listen to podcasts, and ask all your questions—even if they feel silly. No question is too small. You don’t want to go through life wondering what your birth experience could have been. Just know you deserve the best birth experience, whether that’s at home or in a hospital.

Final Thoughts

Thank you, Vanessa for opening up about your home birth journey with us! Having your babies at home, surrounded by the people you love the most sounds like a dream! Being the hands of people who provide such amazing care truly makes you feel so safe. I am so happy you got to experience this!

I hope you enjoyed Vanessa’s incredible birth story! If you have any questions or want to share your own experience, feel free to leave a comment below. Stay tuned for more real birth stories coming soon!